I’ve talked a lot this week in the non-virtual world about survival.  I remember while going through the divorce from the first spouse I leaned hard on my mother.  Even though I was absolutely relieved not to married to the tyrant any longer, the breakup of my family was very hard on me, since I’m a huge family person.  When I got down to about 98 pounds, my mother was trying to fatten me up with Burger King and ice cream.  I sobbed and told her how weak I felt.  She firmly told me, “What do you mean?  You’re the strongest woman I know.”  My tears dried immediately.  I was so confused at the time… but then I remembered something.

I was born over two months premature back in the 1970’s when the mortality rate for extremely premature babies wasn’t the greatest.  I was born blue, next to death.  I fought through, even then.  But not without consequences.  My hearing suffered and so did my vision.  I was plagued with upper respiratory problems through most of my childhood.  Surgeries, medicine and illness were pretty common for me.   Things leveled out by adolescence.

I suffered sexual abuse from a family friend.  After thinking my shrink was completely worthless, when I realized he wasn’t even listening to me, I decided to take matters in my own hands.  I read as much as I could to understand what happened to me and how to heal.  I was determined not to become a statistic.  I did get revenge on the son-of-a-bitch a few short days after getting my driver’s license.  And oh yes, it was sweet to drive by and see CHILD MOLESTER in dead grass in his front lawn.

When a larger girl bullied me in high school, I didn’t take that lying down either.  The biggest casualty on my end from that fight was my favorite Ozzy Osbourne – Randy Rhodes tribute shirt.  But she never did mess with me again.  And while I don’t necessarily have an appreciation for violence, sometimes you have to fight fire with fire.  Standing up to my bully – and beating the crap out of her – was liberating.

Spousal Abuse… I had my Ike & Tina Turner moment there as well.  And oh yes, it felt good.

Finally, a few years ago, a few young males decided I was going to take a ride in a van with them.  I thought differently.  Though I wound up with a black eye out of the deal, I imposed my will and survived the attack.  Thankfully, I never did have to see the inside of that van, nor discover what sort of plan these degenerates had in mind.

Through all of this I maintain a healthy sense of humor.  You have to have the good to balance out the bad.  Comedy and humor are our greatest gifts.

Everyone has a story.  Everyone has survived something.  When life overwhelms me I look back to see all I’ve survived in my 34 years.   I hope to add a little of my moxie with my characters as I finish perfecting the synopsis for my most recent book.

What about you?  What have you survived and how did you do it?


15 thoughts on “Survival

  1. I do so admire your courage and strength. You are correct, we have all survived and have the scars to prove it, but you shine among us. As a fellow survivor, I believe in balance. Without doubt, there are long years of love and laughter just waiting for you to discover them. At 62 I have to say I found the balance and life is truly beautiful. I pray that you do too.

    Bless, prudence

  2. Wow, Kimberly… What a poignant and inspiring post. Kudos to you for taking your survival and healing into your own hands.

    For me, writing and music have been key for getting through and recovering from tough times. So glad your sense of humor has remained helpful and in tact. Stay well and keep posting! 😉

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